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Slacking and Other Updates

Ok, I will be the first to admit, I haven’t posted an update in about forever!  So much has happened in the last few months.  As a start, I still reply to all comments that come to me here and to every email that comes to me through this site and for being diligent in sending your messages along, I thank you.  I get far less hate mail and far more support emails and messages for help or those who just want to tell their stories and know they are not alone.  I was hoping that this would be the end result at some point.  Kindred spirits all conjoining together.  I know that I felt really good to know that I wasn’t alone in my own situation with other William Jordan victims, to hear their stories, hear their feelings and see how they have overcome it all through the years and how it does get better.  It’s true, time does heal all things.  I am in a better place than I was 6 months ago and certainly in a better place a year ago when the whole legal drama ended with Jordan going back to jail. That, I will say, is where my healing truly began.

I started to write my book and when it got just past the part of his first arrest, to read back on my own text messages and emails became really hard.  To analyze it all through different eyes was hard.  I had seen where I was trusting too much, loving too much, putting faith in not just one basket, but a basket full of holes.  Gaping ones.  I was able to read conversations between us where he would constantly turn things around on me.  Everything was my fault.  I misinterpreted something he said, I took something out of context, I extrapolated something the wrong way, I was reading more into something than it was, I was being too sensitive, etc, etc, etc.  He would apologize before making a back handed comment that I wouldn’t recognize in my need for forgiveness and acceptance.  So I took time off from the book.  Then last summer I decided to do something crazy like go back to school in 7 week blocks instead of 15 week semesters.  It was very writing intensive and with the kids home from school, trying to be a full time nurse, full time mom and a student on top of it, the book got further pushed to the wayside.  After 2 semesters, I was really feeling a bit overwhelmed with it all.  I realized that online learning is not my cup of tea.  It has been 10 years since I graduated college the first time, but I was married and my daughter was young.  I wasn’t working so that I could focus on school full time and my daughter was in daycare on my school days and picked up by my husband while I studied with my my group of study buddies whom I still consider sacred friends to this day.  I need a classroom, but I am a different woman now.  I work full time nights, I am a full time single mom.  My mom watches my kids on the nights and weekends that I work so I can’t manage to saddle her any more to watch the kids so that I can attend classes and also adjust my work schedule to attend classes in person.  So now school is on hold and we are going back to the book.  I NEED to complete the book.  For starters, a lot of people are asking me about it because they want to read the details that no print or television interview can ever convey because there is just not enough time.  I also wanted enough time to go by that I could also go through the healing process of the last year rather than just the whole sordid story itself.

I am dedicating the year of 2016 as a good year.  It’s going to be a year of metamorphosis and change. It’s going to be life anew on many levels: personally, internally, professionally, educationally and any other way that I can find.  I did an interview with Fox News locally for a show called Chasing News.  It airs between Philadelphia and New York and either leads into the 10pm news or at midnight. It’s a show shot on GoPro cameras and then the various producers discuss the different segments.  So on a random day at Starbucks, me and the one producer, Jessica had an hour long chat.  We’re both local and she had come across my story. In the end Jordan, who has refused every interview that has gone his way – probably because he doesn’t want to get crucified more in the media than he already has been – said he just wants to move on with his life.  That his hysterical!!!  Hopefully he will never be able to move on with another female as long as he lives because he will NEVER change his spots.  After 3 decades of conning and deceit, it’s not going to change. Perhaps he should have made better choices in life.  He has made his bed and will have to lie in his bed of consequences forever.  As if the 20+ victims in his wake will ever be able to truly move on without a scar on their heart and their psyche. As if they will ever be the whole people they were before. Yeah, good luck with that buddy.  As is typical, the male point of view was very antagonistic and judgmental about the sex by fraud law.  It’s always the same misconception: that anyone and everyone will just go willy nilly accusing people of sex by deception.  Unfortunately for the truly ignorant, the judicial system doesn’t work like that.  You will have to provide your burden of proof, your absolute proof that you were deceived, intentionally for the sake of sex.  To prove that the other person acted truly out of malicious intent.  The police are not going to go around arresting every jilted lover out there. That isn’t even the purpose nor intent of the law.  It’s to catch those who go around and essentially catfish people egregiously. Those who lie about their identity, steal another’s identity in order to be with someone and for the purpose to deceive, harm, steal another’s identity, steal their possessions, cause emotional distress up to and including symptoms of post traumatic stress disorder as some victims have experienced in the aftermath of the most severe mental manipulators. Those are the criminals that I want to get off the streets.  The people who would serve to be a psychiatrist’s dream case. So just know, you are not alone.  You are never alone. I have received upwards of 300 emails and facebook messages over the last year of men and women who have been conned in their past.  Sometimes it’s a crime of the heart and mind and others have literally lost everything.  It astounds me as to how common these kinds of crimes are but next to none are prosecuted.  I have hope that in telling people the steps I took, that some people have sought justice in their own right.  For those who couldn’t, I know what it’s like to feel helpless because that’s how I felt before the authorities got involved in my case and it started to take shape.  I can feel that feeling like it was yesterday rather than 2 years ago.  The strong urge to want to stop this reign of terror but not knowing what steps to take, where to turn and who would help.  I also told very few people because I felt so incredibly stupid for falling prey to something like that.  I felt full of shame and regret for putting my family, my children and my friends through that year of fakeness and some people endure it for years or decades.  I have lost friends because of what happened and get judged about it all of the time, but I am in a place that I just don’t give a shit.   I took back my power by giving it a voice, by giving it a name and by going public about it.  Is it for everyone?  No. Everyone has to find their own healing process whether it be through therapy, art, working out, yoga, meditation, music or shouting it loud from the rooftops.  Find what works for you and roll with it.  I hope you find your inner peace.  Below is the Fox News interview:

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Deal or No Deal???

Ok, so as of my last post, we hadn’t reached a resolution on the case of William Allen Jordan aka: Will Jordan, Gee Allen, Guillaume Allen, Gee Jones-Jordan, Bill Jordan, William Jordon, Liam Allen, William Jones and probably others that I’m either forgetting or just am not aware of.  Needless to say it’s variations on a theme.  So apparently either he nor his attorney did NOT appreciate my public awareness of this case (whatever) but out of courtesy I did not post as frequently as I used to because frankly I just didn’t want to piss someone off who could do me a favor before this is all said and done, i.e. his attorney and my prosecutor.  Now at the first status conference with the prosecutor on my case, he said we would give this a 3 strikes and we’re out frame of mind:  basically offer him 3 chances at a plea deal an if he doesn’t take it, screw it, we go to trial and our case is super strong between my emails, text messages (from both Jordan himself and “Tom/Marcus” from the UK from a Washington DC phone number), and then video footage that I secretly shot while wired with hidden cameras in the 2 months that it took me to build my case to the point that they had enough burden of proof to issue an arrest warrant.  New Jersey is a one party consent state meaning as long as one party consents (me) and you are being recorded (him), you don’t need the other party’s permission to record them and use it against them.   He is lucky I haven’t posted my hours and hours of footage on YouTube, but trust me, his exes have seen some of the footage.

I know, you want to know.  Did he take the plea deal this past Monday?   Well……

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YES!!!!   Yes he pled guilty and took the plea deal of 3 years in state prison, restitution of a minimum of $4383, a lifetime no contact to me and my kids and he was slammed with a $15,000 fine!   WIN!!!!    At first the prosecutor said that there was not going to be a resolution that day and I reminded him about his 3 strikes rule.  He said he didn’t recall saying that, but he is at a variety of cases on a weekly/daily basis and mine only came along once a month, so it’s easy for him to forget, but for me this is my ONLY case and I didn’t forget such a thing.  He apparently thought about it and went back to Jordan’s attorney and said that nothing will change in a month – just the fact the deal is off the table and why don’t we just get it done and over with.  Pressed with this info, he accepted the deal!  I really didn’t know if he would drag it out knowing that trial dates would be not coming until a minimum of April, then the trial and then sentencing could linger another 6-8 months, so it would have given him more time out of jail now, but he would be facing 5 years in jail as opposed to the 3 we were offering him.  Unfortunately, without revoking his bail, I couldn’t get him remanded to jail immediately and sentencing was set up for February 6th which I was told he would be sentenced and taken away immediately to jail.   Yes!!!  He had to admit everything that he had done to me.  He had to state his real name, his real age and admit that he did defraud me and take my money by impersonating a government official from the United Kingdom.  Seriously, to hear him admit that to a courtroom full of witnesses, on the record with my mom by my side crying for me to also hear him admit his crimes:  it was priceless.   I will never forget that moment and wish it was video recorded so that I could hear it again and again and again.  He admitted it.  I have been on cloud 9 ever since.

The only downside is that there have been 2 victims since he got out of jail on August 29th.  One of which he met at a bowling alley that his dad bowls on a league with and having known the father, she figured he was an upstanding guy himself.  It wasn’t until the last article on the front page of a local newspaper that her friend tipped her off to the truth and she used Google to find everything she could about him and it led her to me.  I have met her and she is absolutely lovely.  Just a wonderful person who got sucked into his world of lies, of which his father never corrected – even down to him saying he was sent to the UK to live with distant relatives as a child due to an abusive mother.  She of course dumped him the next day and hasn’t heard from him ever since.  Then there was another young girl out of the state of New Jersey who said she met him on eharmony 3 years ago and started a physical relationship with him this year:  basically after I found out about his ass and he probably knew that the thing with me was going nowhere, so on to plan B.  Unless he was setting her up as his escape clause but got arrested before he could fulfill his full plan.  He got out of jail and resumed contact with her and has the poor girl believing his mom died and he is inheriting $100,000 of which he is setting aside a trust for her and her young daughter.  I am so sorry honey, but there is NO money.  First of all, his mother isn’t dead.   I got confirmation of this from an extended family member.  Secondly, She has EXTENSIVE medical bills.  I have seen them with my own eyes and have them on my video footage.  If she died all bills would have to be paid first, the house would probably be paid off (which they have only owned for 10 years and God knows if they have remortgaged the house at any point).  As of now the house is worth about $60,000 less than what was paid for it.  Then Jordan has 2 sisters, so whatever was leftoever would have to be split 4 ways (his dad, him and his 2 sisters) and she may have a will that leaves everything to her husband.  She isn’t dead, so there is no worry.  Do you know how many time his mom has been “gravely ill”, “hospitalized” and other horrible things?   Many, many, many times.  He told me she was in the hospital and then there was a receipt in my car for Burlington Coat Factory the week before he was arrested buying little boy’s Nike sneakers.  Probably with my money.  He probably paid your bills with MY hard earned money and that pisses me off.  Whatever money he has given you since he got out of jail was probably at the expense of another woman.  I wholly intend on giving the ring back if I find out that some other poor woman was scammed out of a large amount of money at once because frankly, I couldn’t keep it.  It’s like blood money.  I didn’t earn it and neither did he – not by respectable means.  He is working at a department store.  He isn’t a nurse.   Do you know where he got that?  His victim from 4 years ago – she was a pediatric nurse.  He tends to emulate whatever he has at the moment and be a chameleon to adapt to whatever the woman needs/wants.  He has no drivers license, so why do you think he took a bus to go see you?  Because he has no car.  I’m a nurse and I make about $35 an hour.  Don’t you think a man living with his parents could afford a car?  He is probably stealing the identiy of you or your child and you are too blind to see it.  Unless you wake up, you are going to learn a very hard and very expensive lesson because he will take you for all that you’ve got or he is using you for your remote location to try to flee to and he will try to get you pregnant which will bind you to him forever and he will leave.   Whatever he is spouting, it’s all lies.  He is incapable of telling the truth because he is a psychopath/sociopath who has been doing this for over 30 years.  People keep telling me you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.   Well you have all of the information to ditch this loser and once it’s on Dateline (still waiting for an air date and they were at court this past Monday), then the whole country will know.

Moving on, the rape by deception law that I helped to craft goes to the New Jersey Assembly tomorrow, November 13th!   I have seen the draft that is being introduced and I love it.  I will have more information on that as it comes along.  You do NOT have to be a victim and one person CAN make a difference.  FInd your power ladies and gentlemen and get out of an abusive and unfulfilling relationship.  Happiness is out there.  I have finally opened myself up to dating again and it’s been amazing.  I am happy with myself, my family and my life – at last.

Here are some articles published this week:

LoveFraud.com article

Burlington County Times (which made the front page – photo below)

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Arraignment Day and the Counter Offer

I have been waiting for this day for weeks. Maybe months. The day William Jordan was arraigned officially on the charges that will actually stick to him. I knew going into it that the prosecutor was going to offer a plea deal of 4 years in state prison (of the 3-5 he is eligible for under my charges), a no contact order and restitution, which I am well aware that I’ll never see a dime of, but it’s just there for the sake of the possibility. The prosecutor was on vacation all of last week so the issues that I’ve had with the “miscommunication” had been shelved all week-long until today. I was having immense anxiety this morning as my phone calls went unanswered. I knew more than one media outlet would be there today, so I grabbed an iced coffee and headed out to the courthouse an hour early to talk to some people in advance. Once the courtroom was opened and everyone filed in, I chose my seat carefully. I knew there was a camera crew there, but I also wanted to not be in the eye view of where Will Jordan would be. I didn’t want to be behind the prosecutor’s table where he could look towards his attorney and catch a view of me over her shoulder. This way if I was behind him, he would have to blatantly turn around to see me and that would avoid any attempt at eye contact. In those minutes that I was sitting there, I’ll admit, I kind of lost it. I could just feel the emotion boiling up and I couldn’t control the tears that came. I hate any possibility of seeing him, of being in the same room, sharing even air space with that evil man. I am so thankful my mom was there and she held my hand as mom’s do and just told me that I was going to be ok, that everything was ok. She helped to keep me grounded in that moment and I reigned it all in and held it together. I wasn’t going to give anyone the satisfaction that he can still get to me.

My victim’s advocate came out to see me and asked if I wanted to talk to the prosecutor prior to the case. Of course while we were talking, the case was called, but without the prosecutor, they moved on to other cases until we came out. He told me that Jordan’s attorney wanted to counter offer something so appallingly ridiculous that I rejected it before he could get the entire offer out of his mouth: 364 days in county jail and a lifetime no contact rule that if he violated it, he could end up arrested again. Not only did that get a vehement no, but a HELL NO. I would rather he do the jail time and risk the contact with me than to let him out after such a short period of time so that he could hurt someone else quicker. I told the prosecutor, and he agreed with me that we would NOT settle for any deal that was less than 4 years. The prosecutor will only tolerate 2 more status conferences after today before demanding a trial and then Jordan can end up with 5 years instead of the 4 that we’re offering. Hey I have hours and hours of basic confessions on his crimes, so if he wants his own word vomit coming back to haunt him in front of 12 jurors and a courtroom full of spectators and reports, well please be my guess. The prosecutor told the judge today that there is this additional discovery that they had not yet acquired from me but that it was there and that they could acquire it within the next week or two. The prosecutor also assured me that he felt absolutely confident in all of our evidence that it would be a fairly slam dunk case. I feel the same way because I backed up so many old conversations, emails and was able to provide the bank records of the various bank transfers that occurred. That coupled with the audio and video I have? I have no idea how he nor his public defender can even think that he has a defensible case. Seriously? He has a long history of defrauding people for decades, what on earth ground does he have to stand on that doesn’t equate quicksand? None. I don’t know if he was waiting to see my hand of if he was just being his typical psychopathic/sociopathic self and trying to control everything around him: controlling my time, the prosecutor’s time, his own attorney’s time. At the end of the day, he didn’t take the deal, he pled not guilty and we’ll reconvene in a month.

I spoke with a couple of members of the media afterwards, notified Mary immediately of what transpired in the courtroom so that she could have immediate answers and she is also 5 hours ahead of me. I was getting out of the courthouse at 3:30pm my time which was 8:30pm her time. I always credit her with giving me my strength – or at least being the foundation for my strength in going forward with my case. The fact that she had the strength to be so public about her story – I would never have known the truth if she hadn’t made that choice. She takes criticism (as I have the last few months) with absolute grace and dignity. She doesn’t let harsh comments get to her. Her story allows me to go forward and keep pounding at Jordan and to not let myself get too down about some setbacks because I need to keep forward motion. I kept myself really busy over the weekend so that I couldn’t reflect on what was going on today and I had a chance to self reflect over the last 6 months since I found out the truth about Jordan. I think of the hot mess that I was in February through April and how every day was so stress riddled and how full of immense emotions I was then to the relief I felt after the arrest. I’ve really had a good 3.5 months to just be. I have also learned that I can’t do all things and be all things to all people all of the time. I needed to let a few things go to the wayside such as writing my book and working on my law. I needed to be a mom, work full-time and work on this case. I needed to be present while the kids were off for the summer. My son starts kindergarten this fall and I know that I can NEVER get this time back from them and will not allow Jordan to rob anymore time away from them than he already has. So I had a girl’s night with my good friend on Friday, took my daughter to the movies on Saturday and then went to Home Depot for supplies to build a firepit in the back yard. Sunday I took my son to a birthday party and then had a night out with great company afterwards. I refuse to let life stop or be paused because of Will Jordan. He robbed my daughter of 2 One Direction concerts last year, so what did I do? Got her One Direction tickets for this Thursday night in Philadelphia. I am going to make right all of the things that he did to her and she will not suffer. For the disappointments that he has given her, I’m going to turn them around. I want to continue to show my children that shit things can happen to you, but you can pick yourself up, turn yourself around, dust yourself off and keep moving. Yes, It’s ok to be mad, be sad, be angry but as long as you don’t stay in that spot, that’s what matters. I hope that I inspire her, inspire my son when he is older. Make them stronger people and less prone to ever be victims. I hope that In inspire someone else out there in the blogosphere to maybe get out of an abusive relationship or have the strength to get away from someone who may be manipulating them. It’s ok to be scared, it’s ok to cry, it’s ok to shout. Healing does come. For me it’s still coming. I wonder how I’ll be 6 months from now. Certainly in a much better place than now. I would LOVE to hope that this jerk will just take the damn plea deal and stop jerking me around because if he wants to fight it, by all means, I’ll go toe to toe with him and he will lose big time. I want to start working on my sex by deception law, but I want to be able to focus 100% on it and I also want to keep working on my book. I keep taking notes and journaling in short spurts. It will come eventually. This period will pass. I know it. More William Jordan victims may come forward. There may be new ones that come along once he gets out of jail (it’s inevitable). I’ll be here to support whomever comes along, past, present or future. Mary Turner Thomson and other victims have been a great source of support to me and I intend to pay that forward. In the meantime, this girl is going to keep moving steps forward and fewer steps backwards. Until next time……